SFWA Saturday Night Party #12: Sunday Morning Aftermath

We open to Skull Jr.'s office, at 12:30 in the morning...

Skull Jr.: Whoa. I knew I shouldn't have drank so much Dr. Pepper. Got to sleep WAY too late.

Director: Um, sir? We've got a whole bunch of angry wrestlers wanting to see you.

Skull: Why? *looks at the clock* JEEZUS. Tell them all that this will be a SFWA Special. Saturday Night Party 12: Sunday Morning Aftermath.

Director: Sounds stupid, but okay!

Narrator: TO THE BASE!

Ring Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one-fall. Coming to the base first, John Diggory!

*John walks down*

Ring Announcer: Coming out next, his opponent, Sleazy P!

*Sleazy P enters very tiredly, and conveniently lays down face-up and goes to sleep. John gets the win*

Ring Announcer: Here is your winner, John Diggory!

*John quietly celebrates his victory*

Ring Announcer: This next contest is to determine the #1 contenders to the SFWA Three Stooges Memorial Tag Team Championship *kicks Sleazy P out of the base*. Coming out first, they are the team of Flame and Liam Doran...TEAM EUROPE!

*Team Europe makes their way down*

Ring Announcer: *hangs up his cellphone* Um, it turns out that Karnage and Carl Robbin are unable to make the match. Turns out they got really pissed off at waiting and went to the bar. They were then arrested for giving fake IDs and are surrendering the match. Your winners, Flame and Liam.

Narrator: TO THE CASS!

Zaq Cass: So yeah...Jake Xinn. Nobody's seen you much since you lost those Tag Titles. Um...I'm gonna win this one, k? Oh, and I'm awesome. Yeah. Where the fuck is my paycheck? I WANT OVERTIME!

Narrator: TO THE BASE!

Ring Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one-fall and is for the SFWA Three Stooges Memorial Tag Team Championship. Coming to the base first they are the challengers, Adrian Blaquehart and Instinct!

*Adrian and Instinct walk down*

Ring Announcer: Next, their opponents. They are the SFWA Three Stooges Memorial Tag Team Champions, King BW and Shawn Selby!

*Big Will and Shawn make their way down, and the match begins. The action gets hot pretty quick as everyone goes outside in a weapon-filled brawl. Will holds Instinct up as Shawn has a chair and Shawn swings back, yells "WISCONSIN!" and goes for the chair shot. However, Instinct gets out of the way and Will is hit. Instinct gets Shawn by surprise with a roll-up and the 1-2-3*

Ring Announcer: Here are your winners and the NEW SFWA Three Stooges Memorial Tag Team Champions, Adrian Blaquehart and Instinct!

*Adrian and Instinct grab the belts and excitedly go backstage*

Narrator: TO THE RIZZ!

The Rizz: Is it just me or has JLV been getting shots at this belt a lot lately? I mean, let's look back at the last ten Saturday Night Parties. Of the last ten, he's gotten three shots at the belt. Saturday Night Party 4, SNP 7, and SNP 9. And he's been unsuccessful in all those attempts. SFWA, time to give someone else a shot. Seriously.

Narrator: TO THE BASE!

Ring Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one-fall and is for the SFWA Night Out On The Town Championship. We've gotten special permission to do this match from the base. Coming out first, he is the challenger, Jake Xinn!

*Jake walks out, tired and cranky*

Ring Announcer: Next, his opponent. The current SFWA Night Out On The Town Champion, ZAQ! CASS!

*Zaq comes down, and picks up the steel chair that knocked Big Will out. He hits Jake with it and gets the pin*

Ring Announcer: Your winner and STILL the SFWA Night Out On The Town Champion, Zaq Cass!

*Zaq walks away happy, and soon finds a place to sleep backstage*

JLV: *standing on the roof of the house* Now hold on just a second! *everybody looks up* I lost that promo contest mentioned a few times on this show, and am so sad I'm thinking of jumping! Don't say the wrong thing or I'll do it!

The Rizz: *walks out* Hey, hey, JLV. It's only a promo contest. It doesn't matter you lost. Lost horribly. Lost so incredibly bad that it's a disgrace to not only you, but promos in general. Skull lost too, and he's not taking it as seriously.

JLV: Promos are serious business!

The Rizz: No it isn't. It isn't your fault you can't promo anymore. It isn't your fault you lost 4-0. It isn't your fault nobody liked your incredibly short finals promo. Like I said before, Skull had all that same crap and he's not about to jump.

*JLV jumps, but lands on the unusually soft but still kinda hard base, where Rizz delivers a suplex to him and gets the win*

Ring Announcer: Here is your winner and STILL SFWA Class Clown Champion, The Rizz!

*Rizz takes his belt and leaves*

Narrator: Will Skull actually put the next episode out on time? Will JLV get over his depression? Did you know Lucky Charms mascot Lucky is a murderer? Find out on "Saturday Night Party"!

Boom baby