SFWA Saturday Night Party #22

We open to Skull Jr. once again, in his office.

Skull Jr.: Welcome one and all to the last edition of the Super Fun Wrestling Awesomeness' "Saturday Night Party". I'm Skull Jr., the owner...well, at least that is, until the show is over. But we'll get back to that in a second. I want to start off by saying thank you to the fans who have supported us all through the first, second, and admittedly short third seasons. We were proud to entertain you all. We're showing this appreciation by having the Class Clown Championship match at the top of the card. Now then, about the ownership. As soon as this show is over, all of our contracts and everything else are to be sold. To whom you ask? To the man who owns and operates the Blacklight Underground Wrestling Syndicate, Cryptic. I wish everyone going in to BUWS from SFWA good luck. And now without any further ado, let's go to the base.

Narrator: TO THE BASE!

Ring Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one-fall and is for the SFWA Class Clown Championship!

*Instinct makes his way down, followed by an entrance from Adiran Blaquehart, the champion*

Ring Announcer: First of all, to my left, he is the challenger. INSTINCT!

*Instinct stretches a bit before returning his focus to Adrian*

Ring Announcer: Secondly, to my right, he is the SFWA Class Clown Champion...ADRIAN! BLAQUEHART!

*Adrian signals to the audience, and the match begins. The two lock-up, with Instinct getting in a quick headlock, with Adrian getting out of it just as fast. The two chain a bit and then stare eachother down. They shake hands and start striking back-and-forth, with each strike being more powerful than the last. Adrian finally knocks Instinct down and puts him in a Boston Crab. Instinct gets out of it and gets the armbar on Adrian, who counters by rolling Instinct up. Kick-out at 1. After a few more minutes, Instinct gets Adrian down with a powerbomb and then tries to get him for the Tombstone Piledriver, but Adrian reverses and delivers the move himself. The two are down and Adrian gets to his feet first. He puts Instinct in another Boston Crab and Instinct taps out*

Ring Announcer: Here is your winner and STILL SFWA Class Clown Champion, Adrian Blaquehart!

*Adrian takes the belt and picks Instinct up. He raises his hand and the two walk to the back*

Narrator: TO THE BACKSTAGE!

*the Backstage Interviewer is about to get a word with the two Masks, and is surrounded by security guards just in case they decide to attack again*

Interviewer: What are your thoughts on tonight's main event against two other teams?

Mask #1: Are you joking with these guards?

Mask #2: This is what we think...we don't care. We'll whoop Team Europe again and do the same to this Xinn and McMullin just as badly! After we're done with them, I'll challenge the Night Out On The Town Champion and he will challenge the Class Clown Champion. Even if SFWA is ending, we're gonna make good on our promise and have all the gold by the end.

Mask #1: Yes, now leave. You are interrupting our training.

Interviewer: Back to the base.

Narrator: TO THE BASE!

Ring Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one-fall. Coming to the base first, Chongo!

*Chongo enters, just as energized as usual*

Ring Announcer: Coming out next...*someone else whispers something to him* well it seems as if Ryan Brodie couldn't make it. Your winner by forfeit, Chongo!

*Chongo leaves happy, but confused*

Narrator: Meanwhile, in the basement of the Euros...

Flame: Who's gonna win?!

Liam: We're gonna win! Who's gonna win?!

Flame: We're gonna win! MASKS! You both have gotten under not only our skin, but everyone else in the SFWA as well. Those Tag Belts are ours and always have been. We have dominated the tag scene, and you both know it!

Liam: And we're also up against two old rivals, Jake Xinn and Josh McMullin. Making a comeback, eh? Well, let us be the first to deliver a beating to you as a present. We're walking out as the champs, and there's nothing you guys, or the Masks, pussies that they are, can do about it.

Flame & Liam: WHO'S GONNA WIN?!

Flame: You know it. *throws a towel over the lens of the camera*

Narrator: TO THE BASE!

Ring Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one-fall. Coming to the base first, Psychotic!

*Psychotic enters, this time wearing a fruit hat and doing the chicken dance on his way down, of course accompanied by his dirt collection*

Ring Announcer: Good lord your weirdness is over-the-top. Um...coming our next, Daniel Makabe!

*Daniel comes down, and the match begins. It ends quickly though, as Psychotic gives him the Straight Jacket and wins*

Ring Announcer: Here is your winner, Psychotic!

*Psychotic celebrates and then cartwheels his way backstage*

Narrator: TO THE BACKSTAGE!

Jake Xinn: We might have not been around that much during the last two seasons but we are BACK and better than ever!

Josh McMullin: Team Europe, you're so certain that you're gonna win? Murphy's Law, man. Nothing is certain.

Jake: And these masked guys, what is this all about?

Josh: Gonna take over SFWA, huh? Well that's a bunch of crap. If you guys can't beat anybody cleanly, then you're truly incapable of taking anything over. Even if you have all the gold.

Jake: Just wait until tonight guys, let the real champions show you how it's done.

Narrator: TO THE BASE!

Ring Announcer: The following contest is the OH DAMN! Match, wherein the loser will receive a low-blow from every other participant. The rules are simple. To get "free", a wrestler must pin or submit another one. The last one left is the loser. Coming to the base now, the participants. JLV, Karnage, Carl Robbin, Kris Blaze, Mike Del, Krusifix, Jay Will, Sleazy P, and Prototype!

*The men all enter at one time, and the match begins. The order of "freedoms" goes as such: Mike, Carl, Krusifix, Kris, Jay, JLV, and Prototype until the final two are Sleazy P and Karnage. After brawling, Sleazy ironically enough low-blows Karnage, gives him the Scissors Kick and pins him 1-2-3*

Ring Announcer: Here are your winners, JLV, Carl Robbin, Kris Blaze, Mike Del, Krusifix, Jay Will, Sleazy P, and Prototype!

*Karnage is forced to take the low-blows by everyone until the last man, Carl shows up. He refuses to do such a thing to his tag partner and the two make a hasty retreat*

Narrator: TO THE CASS!

Zaq Cass: I swear man, if I don't get my title back, someone's getting a false pizza order. With anchovies. I'm serious.

Narrator: TO THE BASE!

Ring Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one-fall. Coming to the base first, Rad Hazard!

*Rad makes his way down*

Ring Announcer: Making his way next, his opponent. Shawn Selby!

*Shawn enters the base, and the match begins. Rad almost immediately knocks the wind out of Shawn with a kick to the gut and then gives him a Frogsplash for the win*

Ring Announcer: Here is your winner, Rad Hazard!

*Rad celebrates and runs to the back*

Narrator: You know, just because the non-championship one-on-one matches are filler doesn't mean they have to suck. Oh, we're on? Um...to the ...somewhere?

*Big Will is sitting in an office*

King BW: Well hello great and wonderful fans, it is I, King BW. Unfortunately I could not be at the show today as I was out on business but I will give my thoughts on SFWA's closing...I've still got money so I don't really care either way. Goodbye, good luck, and get fucked.

Narrator: That was weird. TO THE BASE!

Ring Announcer: The following is another meaningless match scheduled for one-fall. Coming out first, The Rizz!

*Rizz makes his way to the base and sits on a chair*

Rizz: Now The Rizz has just one question. Why didn't he get his title rematch? You'd think being the best overall wrestler in SFWA, in addition to this being the last episode, The Rizz would've gotten his rematch.

*Tony Deppen tries to ambush him but Rizz hits him with his chair*

Rizz: As The Rizz was saying, it would've been nice for him to get his rematch. Guess I'll just have to take it out on this guy.

*Rizz pins Tony*

Ring Announcer: Here is your winner, The Rizz!

*The Rizz shrugs the win off and heads back*

Narrator: TO THE BA- oh wait...

Ring Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one-fall and is for the SFWA Night Out On The Town Championship! Coming to the base first, the challenger...ZAQ! CASS!

*Zaq enters, repeatedly saying "I'm serious about the pizza!"*

Ring Announcer: Coming out next, he is the SFWA Night Out On The Town Champion...John Diggory!

*John comes down, and the match begins. Just as Adrian and Instinct did in the opening bout, Zaq and John shake hands. The two chain for a bit until Zaq gains the upper-hand. He performs a suplex on John and goes for the quick pin, kick out. John counters with a clothesline and then a cross-face. Zaq rolls out of it. The two, figuring it is a hardcore match and title anyway, bring out the weapons. Zaq swings with a light tube and misses, as does John. The two try and try again until Zaq gets John across the back, then steals his light tube and hits him again. Zaq tries to pin John again but John is persistent. John trips Zaq using a kendo stick and gets him across the body with it. John tries to pin Zaq and almost gets the pin but Zaq kicks out just before 3. Zaq and John get back up to their feet when Zaq knees John in the face and sets up a table. While John was down though he hid the belt underneath him and surprised Zaq by clocking him in the head with it. Zaq immediately goes down and John sets the table on fire. He gets Zaq up and powerbombs him through the table. After the flames are extinguished John goes for the pin and gets the 1-2-3*

Ring Announcer: Here is your winner and STILL SFWA Night Out On The Town Champion, John Diggory!

*John celebrates, but not for long as the Masked Men come out and take him out. Zaq tries to help but the Masks beat him down too*

Mask #1: Screw the entrances, Team Europe, Team ACW, get your asses out here and let's finish this!

*The two other teams come out and the match begins with an all-out brawl. Josh is the first to go, eliminated after a Euro Bomb. Flame is next, eliminated by one of the Masks after a chokeslam. Jake and Liam try to co-exist and take out the Masks as a team, but to no avail as Liam is the next eliminated. Jake tries the hardest he can to fend off the Masks but it's no use as he is eliminated last*

Ring Announcer: Here are your winners, and STILL the SFWA Three Stooges Memorial Tag Team Champions, the Masked Men!

*The Masks take their belts, stand in the middle of the base and celebrate their victory, but then...*

Adrian Blaquehart: *walking down with Instinct* Now hold on just a second! *the two Masks turn their attention to the team* We're not gonna end SFWA like this. Instinct and I challenge you two right now to a Tag Title match!

Mask #2: That's fine, as long as you, Adrian, put up that Class Clown Championship!

Adrian: I will do just that, and while we're at it, let's make this a hardcore match!

*Skull Jr. then walks out*

Skull: You know Adrian, Instinct. I love your proposal and I am going to allow this match to go down just as both the teams have stipulated it. Ring Announcer, do what you do best.

Ring Announcer: The following contest is an impromptu hardcore match for the SFWA Three Stooges Memorial Tag Team Titles and the SFWA Class Clown Title. In the ringside area already, the Three Stooges Memorial Tag Team Champions, the Masked Men! And their opponents, also at ringside, Instinct and the SFWA Class Clown Champion...Adrian Blaquehart!

*Skull walks up to Adrian & Instinct*

Skull: Show these cowards what SFWA is made of! Kick their asses, guys!

*Adrian & Instinct rush the base and the match begins. For 20 minutes no team has a clear advantage until Adrian Irish Whips a Mask into the toolshed, leaving a huge dent in it. Adrian takes his handcuffs and cuffs him to the fence. Adrian and Instinct double-team the other one and take his handcuffs too, doing the same to him as they did to his partner. After hitting him repeatedly with chairshots, the Masks are uncuffed and pinned by Adrian & Instinct*

Ring Announcer: Here are your winners and the NEW SFWA Three Stooges Memorial Tag Team Champions, Adrian Blaquehart & Instinct!!!

*Adrian & Instinct celebrate with the belts*

Instinct: Hey, let's find out who these guys are.

Adrian: Yeah, everyone's been wondering.

*They unmask the Masks, who are revealed to be Karnage and Carl Robbin*

Skull: *walks up to them* Well, looks like we found our crooks. *motions to the back* Everyone, come out here and do all your specials on these guys. That's what they deserve.

*Every roster member in SFWA came out and did so, then carried out the new Tag Champs out of their shoulders, celebrating the victory*

Narrator: Well, there we have it. The end of Super Fun Wrestling Awesomeness. It's been a short but fun ride, and we're glad you all shared the experience and loved it as much as we did. To find out what happens next, watch Blacklight Underground Wrestling Syndicate's Thursday Night Pulse. I'm sure they'll do something with our guys. But until then, The End.

*2 Hours Later, Big Will and Skull Jr. are talking in Skull's office*

King BW: Skull, man, there's something I found in the contract you're not gonna believe.

Skull: What is it?

King BW: There's a clause in here that states now that the sale has gone through, effective midnight tonight, your administrative contract becomes a wrestler contract.

Skull: Oh no...are you serious?

King BW: Totally serious. What are you planning on doing about this?

Skull: ...Training.